Get A Will! Don’t Pay Yourself To Care For Family:
Will Young made his mark as an entrepreneur and civic leader, helping raise more than $25 million dollars for companies and nonprofits in his capacity as board member (serving on ten boards), and business owner from 1996 to 2011. After writing four business books, a knock on his door in 2011 changed his world forever. Now he writes and records books, podcasts, plays, keynotes, movie scripts, short stories, and blog posts from his own life experiences and failures.
Quote: “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” Viktor Frankl
Today’s Top 3 Takeaways:
- Live With Gratitude
- Be The Comeback King
- Be Yourself
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Timestamped Show Notes:
05:20 – The funny thing is, when they came in the house that day, my wife and I, we still joke about it to this day… You have to find a way to look at it, that’s exactly what the first couple of years of this was like. It was hard, but you kind of you relax with it. We joked around because neither one of us knew what was going on. I looked at it, I thought, was she cheating on me with somebody? Is she in the mafia, something that I don’t know about? Is she living a double life? All these weird thoughts. Then she’s looking at me going, are you looking at weird stuff on the internet? I mean, just all these thoughts, because you have no idea nowadays, and then, why are these people in our house?!
10:45 – We had to end up selling our home, we had to end up dealing with all kinds of different issues that weren’t documented. So I’m doing the best I can based on what I believe they wanted. Well, there were other family members who disagreed. So that became a big point of of problem.
20:00 – The number one thing is, anybody involved, and I mean anybody, step relatives, uncles, aunts, brothers cousins, friends down the street, they should all be involved in all the decisions for clear communication. Either in writing, in a group meeting, etc, so that there’s witnesses that can say, yeah, I saw that all 10 of us agreed with what were doing. I mean, other than what you said, the wills and signed agreements and all that stuff. The other thing too, is just don’t pay yourself to take care of your your relatives. I mean, there’s a lot of different philosophies on that.
31:50 – We had to have two different attorneys. You can’t have one attorney represent you. So you have to have two separate attorneys. It just became this odyssey, I felt like every day I was getting up and having an out of body experience because it was so not my life of crime. Up to this point, I only had some speeding tickets. I had an open container when I was like 19 years old in college. That was it. So here, I was caught in this thing. Thank God she, I mean, she’s just an angel. To this day, she’s it, she has incredible friends. She’s an incredible person. Thank God because if she wasn’t, she would have left me in a heartbeat.
40:50 – I think it was smart move. I don’t have a legal background. I’m not here to say whether you are guilty or innocent. I love the fact that you’re honest. You say, we definitely screwed up, and we definitely didn’t do some things that were within the legal process, that’s why we got nailed. Then you stepped up and you owned it because you want to protect your family and not get drug through a massive trial of hell.
50:00 – Assisted living doesn’t stay easy, even when we put them both in assisted living. It just made a lot of our challenges even worse, because you still have to get them to doctors, you still have to make sure their fed, they have clothes. I mean, people think well, we just put them away. You got to pay for it. You got to be involved in all of it or find somebody or pay somebody to be involved in it.
54:20 – Final Words
Our Final Words of the Show:
If I narrowed it down to three key points… Number one would be gratitude. It’s important to have that, no matter what’s going on in your life, find the good things to focus on the good things. If you focus on the negative and the bad, that’s what grows. I mean, we hear that all the time on every book and self-development podcast. It’s probably cliche, but here’s the reality. It probably saved my life, just finding that gratitude.
Second thing and this is what I teach my kids all the time, is you can come back from anything. Truly anything, if I could survive this, and again, there’s people who’ve been through way worse than me. I mean, God forbid you lose a child or there’s just things that are way worse than what I went through. But the reality is if you can come back from whatever it is, if you just keep working, you can come back. But that’s what I tell my kids all the time.
I think the third thing is, it may be around the word, or the feeling of authenticity and love. Being yourself. I think I was pretending to be somebody. I mean, there were bits and pieces of me that were me. But I was losing. One of my friends said, you know, back in that day, you were so buttoned up. I was like, what do you mean buttoned up? He said, it was like, we didn’t get to see the real you. We didn’t get to talk to the real you. Even now, it’s hard for me. I mean, it’s hard for me to say I’m a convicted felon, that it’s like I just said, but it’s the reality and it’s me, and it’s okay. I’m okay, because I’m still a good person. I’m still living a great life.
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